Asbury Math Prof Discovers Lincoln Chip!
Professor Dave Coulliette made an interesting discovery last year, a remarkable likeness of Abraham Lincoln formed in a paint chip on the third floor stairwell door of the Hamann-Ray Science Center.
‘I was wandering around on the third floor, trying to find my office, and ‘bam’, there was Abe!’, quipped Coulliette regarding this landmark discovery. He continued, ‘I believe that the Abe chip confirms Lincoln’s endorsement of our math programs from beyond the grave; such a great leader must have certainly been a good mathematician’.
The peculiar paint chip does bear a striking resemblance to our 16th president, though perhaps more striking to a mind trained in topological transformations.
The Lincoln discovery has had a significant impact on the often-neglected HR third-floor community. ‘Tour groups regularly stop by to see the chip; Coulliette tried to set up a photo stand to raise money, but it didn’t work’, commented Dr. Towanna Roller. The latest member of the math floor has also contributed positively to the social life of many of the math majors on campus. ‘It’s a nice conversation-starter’, said Kelly Christensen, a junior math major, ‘If a friend isn’t interested in my latest Real Analysis proof, I can often get them talking about the Abe chip’.
The Great Emancipator has apparently had great influence on campus romance as well. ‘After my Calculus Study Group sessions, I invited one of my group-mates to hang around and look at the Lincoln chip’, states sophomore Financial Math major Brian Hazlett, ‘she wasn’t too interested at first, but now we’re dating!’ Hazlett was not allowed to release the name of his alleged girlfriend.
‘I’m just delighted that we have another great reason for students to visit the math floor of Hamann-Ray; there’s more to us than just proofs, code, and origami’, states Coulliette. ‘I’m just hoping that Washington, Jefferson and Roosevelt may appear to form a sort of Asbury ‘Door Rushmore’.